I was asking a friend a question about the lecture we just had, when my professor, also a dean of our college, overheard me and asked me if I had a question he could answer. I shyly responded 'no, nothing really'. And he looked at me and said 'I am here to answer your questions but you would rather ask your friend that question than me?'. He smiled and walked away to answer someone else. It made me think.. How many times do we try to solve our problems by ourselves, when the GREAT I AM is here, as a friend, as a Father, to help us with our every need.
Fellowship Week One: Black and Blue
I’m typing this, in my bed with sheets pulled over my face. It’s been a day. And I still have tasks looming over me that I still have to do but it has been a day, a long day. After four years of residency, I had finally felt comfortable with the management my adult and pediatric patients in the clinic and on the floor. And today to be back at square one, with a knowledge base that is minimal, that’s hard. I am in the ICU with infants and children with complex cardiac diseases often needing urgent or emergent intervention to save their lives. And to not know. If I’m being honest, it’s the toughest on my ego. Its bruised today, blue and black from all the hits of inadequacy and feelings of inferiority. But it's humbling to be here again, face to face with what I lack. But as I stare my inadequacy in the face, I realize a few things. One, that this weakness is not always. Your first year is only the first year once. First week only comes once. I will not always be...
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